(almost) The End.

Dear Friends,

I would like to say that I'll be leaving a little earlier than scheduled. Yesterday, my grandmother called me up to surprise me with a trip to Hokkaido for a week plus on the fifth of November with her and my grandfather. Yes, just the three of us eating sushi in fish markets, laughing at Geishas and taking pictures under the cherry blossoms. I'm looking forward to it very much, it'll be my last holiday alone with them before I leave.

Coincidentally, also on the fifth of December, I'll be leaving for Osaka/Tokyo (again) with my family & the board of directors of SFIC & their children, for another two weeks. I'm pretty excited about winter in Nippon, I've already started sorting out my packing list in my head. It's been about ten years since I've last visited Nippon and it's lovely that I'm spending time with my family there, twice in the span of a month.

In such an event most definitely God planned, a bright idea flew into my head, that I should fly over to San Francisco to live with X. for two good weeks, visiting gay clubs, soaking up the Californian sunshine, Fisherman's Wharf, bendy roads & trams, spending good quality time with her, before flying back to Tokyo to meet my long lost parents, who's daughter has become slightly demented from all the flying around, escaping from Singapore (reality).

And then I could meet X. in Narita Airport at the end of my Tokyo trip, who will be flying back home in Singapore, to eat some sushi and pretend to speak Japonais, before coming home together, or perhaps just to exchange Christmas presents, and I'll set off to the States from there. I haven't decided the last leg yet, but I know I'll be really tired from all the travelling.

I'm a little afraid to count the days I have left, but I probably won't be back for good.

So please, if there're any of my things which may have caught your eye, bags, pieces of clothing, shoes, photographs of yourself which I may have captured during one of our happy parties, any softies, paints, little jewellery, lomography cameras which you've always wanted to own, do let me know because I'll like very much to give it to you.

I would like to leave a part of myself with you, letting you know that you had been important to me during my growing up years in Singapore. I believe that people don't meet just by chance and that relationships/friendships between us are God ordained. The only things I cannot give are my two favourite diamond rings, star of david, ballet shoes, Fisheye, and certain photographs of some very special people :) Please do let me know what you'll like as soon as possible so that I have time to write you a (love) letter, telling of what I've always thought of you.
On the same note, if there's anything you've always wanted to ask me, drop me an anonymous comment, or email, and I would love to answer you, just this once :)

God has been truly good. Every time I break my heart, He magically opens doors for me to escape to another place far away from home, just to be alone with Him. I almost gave my heart away again, and found myself in starkly familiar situations. I've learnt my lesson, never will this happen again. I've learnt it well and hard this time, Daddy. I promise I won't allow myself to fall again.

I'm getting a little weary from all this running away, I hope to settle down in the States soon, in a place where I can really belong, far away from the pain here. Even up till the end, I still find myself hurting. When is this ever going to end, I wonder.

Goodnight, sleep tight. I wish you the sweetest of dreams.