I lie quite often.
I like to say, 'I'm fine', 'I'm not crying', 'I know what I'm doing'. But the truth is that my heart and will are in shreds. The navigation arrow on my compass has been broken for quite awhile now and I don't really know where I'm heading. This predicament does not bode well. For the past few days, I've been physically feeling this overwhelming sadness welling from the pits of my belly. And it makes me sick. But because I'm a realist, I blame it on the antibiotics.
I'm also not ready to leave because there're too many things left undone. And right now, she is also used to being without me.
Please be well, J. I'll find you soon. Please give me some time.
Everything will be okay.
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